Saturday, July 3, 2010 9:54 PM
Letter 14: Someone you've drifted away fromDear Hurlstonians,Lately, I've felt like I've drifted away from everybody. Truth be it, I've never been happy since I went to Hurlstone. Sure, the first week was good, I didn't know anybody and everyone was so nice and caring, I took time to learn everyone's names and you all helped me find my way to class and talked to me, asked me questions...then I guess after Crossing the Divide camp, it all changed. When everyone came back, I no longer sat next to the people I sat next to before. People became closer and so I had to sit somewhere else. There were fights in my group that tore us apart and I couldn't do anything about it because I didn't know what was going on. I thought that it would've all been better once I get to know all of you and once I get to talk to each and every one of you as an individual. The last weeks of terms were pretty good, I was socialising a lot more than usual, and I thought to myself 'Bring on term 2! I'd get closer to everybody'. Wrong.Term 2 was even worse. Everything fell apart for me. I could no longer talk to my group, I didn't know what to say or what to do, so I just sat there in silence while everyone was talking about their life and what happened. During the last weeks of Term 2, I went to the Library, supposedly to 'study'. But the reason why I wanted to go to the Library, was so I didn't have to bear seeing my group in the Main Quad. Who would want to sit with people that they can't talk with? I felt like being in the Library, or somewhere quite could make me feel better. The main quad just doesn't make me feel right. During this separation, I've got to know more people in the Donut Quad, and maybe that's the right place for me. Maybe I do belong in someone elses group, but I can't say it. I don't know how to open up the conversation that I'm leaving. Because then you'd ask me what was wrong, and I can't say 'It's because I can't be myself around you, you don't treat me like someone in your group.'And lately, I have been drifting away from everybody. I'm sorry if I've made you worry or have made you sad. I didn't mean to drift away from Hurlstone. There's been a lot going on in my life right now..and there are only a few I can talk to. It's just that...when I've gone to Hurlstone, there has not been 1 full day that I've felt totally happy. Maybe Hurlstone isn't the right school..With Apologies,Joanne LyLabels: challenge, friends, letter, life, sad, school
